My friend Nokia, I knew him well

I think my cell phone is depressed.
Every time I get down to one bar it starts acting funny, exhibiting strange behavior. It begins to beep and flash. Doing all that it can to kill it's battery, and in essence, end it's life. My cell phone tries with all its might to die.
I can't really say I blame it. These days we are asking too much of this handy little device. It's not good enough to just be a phone any more. Back in the day all the phone had to do was hang out on the wall and keep a family in the loop. Now we need photos, task managers and music with our phones. It's just too much to ask of any device!

Cellular Telephones

I used to think I was awesome, cock of the walk, cream of the crop, king in the castle etc. Every one of my friends had at one point destroyed their cell phones. From stepping on them, to burning them, to throwing them to dropping them into toilets. I had never done this. My phone was 3 years old and in great condition. I had no real need or urge to replace it as my friends had done many times before. It's a slippery slope you walk, when you're friends with my friends. One day your phone's display is acting up, the next, you're dropping it into a schooner of beer so that you can chug said beer and drop the phone onto the table... cell phones are expensive.