Mans Best Friend.

One year when I was young my parents bought be a dog for my birthday. They said it was to teach me responsibility and some jazz like that. I didn't really care. I had a dog. That kicked ass, until the responsibility shit came into effect.
My parents expected me to clean up after the damn thing. It crapped a ton. After some hard work I managed to convince Rufus it was a good idea to do that outside.
Problem solved right?
Nope.
My Mom and Dad got mad at me and said that I'd have to go outside and clean all the dog turds up. I had to go pick them up and put them in the trash can. That is not a fun way for a young boy to pass his time.
That became a regular chore and it sucked. I hated it. So one day I had a brilliant idea. I was going to make my crappy job a little more enjoyable. I dumped a pack of crayons out into the dog dish. Lil'Rufus had tie died shits all week. Picking those colourful butt nuggets up made the job a little less unfun.
Rufus also died at the end of that week. I learned a valuable lesson about love and loss. My parents learned that I was not fit to care for another living creature.