Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Cellular Telephones


I used to think I was awesome, cock of the walk, cream of the crop, king in the castle etc. Every one of my friends had at one point destroyed their cell phones. From stepping on them, to burning them, to throwing them to dropping them into toilets. I had never done this. My phone was 3 years old and in great condition. I had no real need or urge to replace it as my friends had done many times before. It's a slippery slope you walk, when you're friends with my friends. One day your phone's display is acting up, the next, you're dropping it into a schooner of beer so that you can chug said beer and drop the phone onto the table... cell phones are expensive.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Bust A Move!

Breakdancing is an example of something that is fun to watch, but would confuse the fuck out of me if I was deaf.

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Grade 6


Grade 6 was a good year.

That was the year I pee'd down the slide at the school for the first time.
It was so liberating. Such an unbridled act of rebelion... It also cleared up a question that had been nagging me for the previous 5 years.
It was like when you have a song in your head and you just can't think of who sings it. But only when you finally think of the artist you don't feel happy, you just feel unthinkably filthy.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

I have a lot of time to think


And I figured out a few things.

1. I really like lemonade, but you'll never catch me drinking it in the winter. That's a delicious summer time only drink.

2. Too many guys wear over sized white sunglasses. Men should never wear women's clothing or accessories. Unless it is for comfort or to make them feel confident, but that mainly applies to panties.

3. My toe nails grow remarkably slower than my finger nails do.

4. If we grow old enough we can look forward to being afraid of escalators; Old people seem to hate them.

5. I tend to forget peoples names right after being introduced to them. I can only assume I am meeting terribly uninteresting people.

6.  My cup of coffee had a warning on it. It said "Caution: Hot" on one line. The line below said "& delicious". I knew it was hot, it could burn me. But I also figured it might be delicious.
I spent my morning flirting with danger.